


Celebrations and Revelations

by glymr, iesika



Series: Kings Among Runaways [21]
Category: DCU - Comicverse
Genre: Angst, Birthday Party, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-10
Updated: 2010-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 17:50:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/801447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glymr/pseuds/glymr, https://archiveofourown.org/users/iesika/pseuds/iesika
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He looks up...and up - until he meets slightly eerie shimmering green eyes. "Wow," he says in spite of himself. Before he can say anything else, he's being enveloped in warm arms and pressed up against her enormous orange breasts.  For a minute Jason thinks he could die happy right here.</p><p>"I'm so glad to finally meet you, Jason," she says warmly. "Dick has told us a great deal about you."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Celebrations and Revelations

  
"Roy, meet Jason and Tim," says Dick. He waves his arm with a stupid flourish. "My new little brothers.  Jason, Tim, this is Roy, also known as Arsenal."

"What, you're passing on the panties?" says Roy as he shakes Tim's hand.  "Preparing for a life without pants, boys?"  He lets go of Tim's hand and takes Jason's, his grip strong and challenging. 

Jason rolls his eyes.  "Just because Dickhead can't dress himself doesn't mean the rest of us have that problem," he says.

"Jason!" gasps Tim.

Roy's eyes widen slightly, his mouth curling into a grin.  He releases Jason's hand and glances at Dick.  "...'Dickhead'?  I like him."

"Don't get any ideas," says Dick with a smirk.  "He's got a serious case of underage."

Roy laughs.  "You have a one-track mind, bird brain."  Grabbing Dick, he pulls him into a hug.  "Happy birthday, Shortpants."

"Thanks, Roy," says Dick, hugging him back enthusiastically.  "I'm glad you came."

Roy opens his mouth to reply, but he's interrupted as the doorbell rings again. Everyone turns to see who the new arrivals will be, and moments later Alfred escorts in two of the most amazing women Jason has ever seen.

Donna Troy is built like...well, there's no getting around it. The woman's a goddess. Her hair is a deep black, her eyes a clear blue, and her tits...Jason pulls his eyes away from them and tries to focus on her face as Dick introduces them. She smiles at him and shakes his hand, leaving him feeling slightly dazed.

Turning to the other newcomer, he finds himself face-to-breast with someone right off the front pages of Sophisticate magazine. He looks up...and _up_ \- until he meets slightly eerie shimmering green eyes. "Wow," he says in spite of himself. Before he can say anything else, he's being enveloped in warm arms and pressed up against her enormous _orange_ breasts.  For a minute Jason thinks he could die happy right here.

"I'm so glad to finally meet you, Jason," she says warmly. "Dick has told us a great deal about you."

"Uh, yeah, me too," he says a bit too fervently to be cool. She smells really good, sort of spicy and sweet. After giving him one more squeeze against her big, soft breasts, she releases him and smiles gently at him. He shakes himself a little. "You have the most amazing tits," Jason blurts out, and Kory looks pleased.

"Thank you," she says sweetly.

"You're welcome," says Jason, and he's about to try for something a little more suave, but now Kory's reaching for Tim and pulling him into a hug just like the one she'd treated Jason to. Tim's eyes get huge and he stiffens right up, flushing red.

Jason smirks at him. He can't really blame Tim - of course, Tim pretty much reacts this way when _anyone_ hugs him.

"And this is the new Robin!" says Kory. "Dick has had many nice things to say about you," she adds as she releases him. "Both of you."

"It's - ah - nice to meet you, Miss Anders," says Tim.

Kory throws back her head and laughs, then pulls a startled Tim into another hug as Jason looks on enviously. "Please, call me Kory, Tim!"

"Shouldn't...shouldn't you give the birthday boy _his_ hug?" gasps Tim, and Kory lets go of him and looks at Dick, her smile turning wicked.

"Oh, the _birthday_ boy gets something much better than a hug," she says, and throws her arms around his neck and pulls him into a liplock right _there_.

Goddamn it, what _is_ it about Grayson that makes everybody fall for him?

"Heh, hope I get the same treatment on _my_ birthday," Jason says as an aside to Tim, or starts to say, but when he turns he finds that Tim's backed up several steps. Probably to get out of hugging range. The thought makes Jason feel a tiny bit better. He glances at the couple - who've gone past kissing and are starting in on the groping - and rolls his eyes. Turning to Tim, he says, "C'mon, let's go see what's going on down by the pool."

It's twilight, but the patio's lit up with long strings of colored lights, and the pool's lights are on, too.  When they get there Jason makes a beeline for the refreshment table. It still feels weird to have food around all the time, whenever he wants it. Alfred always seems pleased when he cleans his plate. Jason doesn't have the heart to tell him that it wouldn't matter _what_ Alfred fed them - he could feed them Lima beans and Brussels sprouts every day, and Jason would still choke them down.

Of course, when Alfred makes Brussels sprouts, they actually taste _good_. They haven't had Lima beans yet, but Jason has a sneaking suspicion that he'll like them, too, if Alfred is the one who makes them.

Picking up a plate, Jason starts filling it with little sandwiches and pizza and pieces of fruit dipped in chocolate. He thinks about reaching for a beer, but Alfred catches his eye, so he takes a glass of lemonade instead.  Looking around, he spots Tim further up toward the house. Dick's got his arm wrapped around him and seems to be introducing him to some tall, broad-shouldered guy in glasses.

Well, fine then.

More people arrive while Jason is busy loading his plate.  Kory's talking to some guy who's sitting in the pool, half-in, half-out of the water.  There's a green octopus there, too, but no one else seems fazed by it, so Jason figures he's invited.

Tim's pretty caught up in a conversation about something, so when Jason catches sight of Roy at the other end of the patio, he heads in that direction. Some of the people he's met tonight are pretty weird, but Roy seems like maybe he's just a guy. He's definitely less creepy than the chick in the hood, and less intimidating than the huge greenish guy with the red eyes hanging out by the dessert table.

Roy is sprawled loosely across a deck lounge, tossing darts at a board someone hung on the side of the house.  "Hey," he says as Jason approaches.

"Hey," says Jason, and sits down to eat.  They sit in companionable silence for awhile, surrounded by the laughter and the music of the party, occasionally punctuated by the *thunk* of another dart in the bulls-eye.

"I can't get over how _quiet_ the new Robin is," says Roy after a few minutes.  Jason looks up. Roy's shaking his head. "He's so serious."

"What's wrong with being serious?" asks Jason, feeling a little defensive on Tim's behalf. It's _true_ , yeah, but Jason _likes_ him that way. It's just how Tim is.

Roy sends his last dart into the board with another *thunk*.  "Nothing," he said, getting up to gather the darts.  "He seems like a sharp kid.  He's just not what I think of when I think of _Robin_ , you know?"

Jason takes a swig of his lemonade.  "What _do_ you think of?"

Roy shrugs, sitting back down again.  "I don't know.  Dick was always sort of...flashy.  Laughing and showing off as he took down the bad guys."

Shaking his head, Jason says, "Tim's not like that at all."

"I can see that."

Talking about Tim makes Jason wonder where he's gotten to.  He looks around, and Dick's got his arm around Tim's shoulders again - or is it _still_?  and talking animatedly to some red-head chick in a wheelchair and a half-robot guy Jason recognizes as Cyborg.

Jason's really getting tired of watching Grayson hang all over Tim, especially after watching the 'birthday boy' make out with Kory a few minutes ago. Tim wouldn't tolerate it from anyone else...it took _months_ before Tim was comfortable with _Jason_ hugging him, and they've known Dick what, a few weeks?

Feeling frustrated, he looks back at the refreshment table. Apparently Alfred's gone inside for supplies or something, so Jason gets up and casually walks over to where the beer is sitting, cold and inviting. He reaches out to grab one by the neck -

"Would you care for some more _lemonade_ , Master Jason?" Alfred's voice comes from directly behind him and Jason nearly jumps out of his skin.

"Shit!" he says before he can think, then winces. "Sorry. Uh, sure, Alfred. That would be great. Thanks," he says quickly. The older man raises an eyebrow and hands him a cup. Jason sighs and turns back to the party.

Well, at least it's _good_ lemonade.

Tim's still talking to the wheelchair chick ....who's actually pretty hot.  He looks like he's enjoying himself, his face slightly flushed as he makes small gestures with his hands, probably trying to explain something.  Thankfully, Dick seems to have wandered off somewhere.  Roy's been joined by Donna and Kory, so Jason makes his way back over to them.

"Hey kid," says Roy when he gets there, and shoves something cold into his hand. "Hold this for me, willya?" Jason blinks down at the beer and then back up at Roy. Roy winks at him.

 _Oh_ , thinks Jason, and grins back. Roy's really not such a bad guy. Jason glances around. Alfred is talking to a thin guy with red hair, who's looking at him sheepishly. Jason turns his back on them and takes several swigs, draining half the bottle before handing it back to Roy and sitting down next to Kory on a bench

God, he needed that.

The sky is completely dark, now.  Kory's golden skin seems to gleam under the soft lights, her eyes glowing faintly green in a way that really should be weirder than it is.  She's laughing at something Roy said, her body shaking and boobs quivering.  Jason sways toward her a little, grinning.  God, she's gorgeous.

Tossing her hair back from her face, she leans forward - way closer than a girl usually sits unless she's really interested. "Will you help me with something, Jason?"

Jason's pretty sure he'd help her with anything she asked - probably up to and including world conquest. Roy's making faces over her shoulder, laughing but also shaking his head and waving his hands back and forth. Jason's got no idea what the other man is trying to tell him though, so he just nods to Kory and says, "yeah, of course."

"My friends - certain friends especially-" she turns and looks over her shoulder but by then, Roy is gazing innocently off into the distance, "-sometimes make little jokes at my expense. I do not always understand Earth culture. I wish for independent corroboration of something Roy has just told me."

"Sure," Jason says, and now at least he knows why Roy was trying to send him some kind of signal. He seems to have given up, by now, and he's just bent over his own knees, laughing silently and wiping tears from the corners of his eyes while Donna looks on in amusement.

"Is it customary to subject a young man to sexualized corporal punishment on his birthday?"

Jason blinks at her, his mouth open. He hasn't quite recovered from his surprise when Roy's laughter cuts through the night air.

"Birthday spankings!" Roy gasps, and beside him, even Donna has dissolved into giggles. "I was telling her about birthday spankings! She added the sex part herself, I swear!"

Kory sits up straighter, her lush lips pressing into a pout. "Your tone implied-"

Donna cuts her off. "His tone _always_ implies." She opens her mouth to say something else, but Roy leans over and bites her on one bare shoulder, making her shriek with surprised laughter and kick him back into his own chair. 

"So," Kory says, ignoring her friends as they start to wrestle, "these spankings are customary?"

Jason shrugs. "Sure, I guess. I mean, some people do it."

Kory sits back with a thoughtful look on her face. She turns and looks over her shoulder toward the pool, and Jason does the same. Tim's not standing over by the food anymore, and when Jason looks around, he doesn't see him anywhere.

Stop being such a _girl_ , he tells himself irritably. It's not like he has to know where Tim is all the time, or Tim has to know where he is. He's probably just gone to the can, or something. Still, when Tim doesn't come back after a few minutes, Jason starts to feel antsy.

"Excuse us," Roy says, and Jason looks up. Somehow he'd managed to get Donna into his lap, but now they're standing. "Getting kind of late. Ought to find Bruce and say goodnight."

"It was very nice to meet you," Donna says. She leans down and shakes his hand, her grip strong and sure. When he lets go, she turns and heads for the patio doors. Roy hands Jason his beer and follows behind her, looking pleased with himself.

Jason scans the grounds again, but Tim's still nowhere to be seen. He catches Dick's eye without meaning to and glances away, but not before Dick grins and starts heading across the yard in their direction. Something occurs to Jason just as Dick reaches the edge of the patio, and he turns to Kory. "You're supposed to hit pretty hard," he says, quietly. "It's tradition."

"Thank you," she says, and favors him with a blinding smile.

"Don't mention it," Jason says. He drains the bottle in his hand and gets up to go find Tim.

* 

Tim's never really thought of himself as being much for parties, but he's actually been having a really good time so far. He'd been feeling really awkward until Dick had apparently taken pity on him, shepherding him around and acting as a buffer between Tim and the people he was meeting. He'd introduced Tim to a few people he thought Tim would like.  Tim can't help but grin to himself, thinking of all those afternoons he used to spend in the records room of the library.  How fantastic was it that the whole time he'd been about ten yards from Batgirl, and he'd never even known it?

Superman had turned out to be really nice - not that Tim had thought he'd be terrible, but he'd been approachable in a way Tim hadn't expected at all. Jason seems to be having a good time, too. Tim had worried a little when they'd sort of gotten separated near the drinks, but Jason seems to have hit it off pretty well with Arsenal, and that makes Tim happy. He's glad to see Jason making new friends - especially friends who might make him more comfortable with the superhero thing.

As for Tim, he's gotten himself caught up in a conversation about telepathy and cybernetics that's lasted most of half an hour. The subject is interesting, and between them, Garth and Stone have got some fascinating ideas - but his mind is only half on it. Mostly he's watching Jason laughing with his new friends up by the house, his mood, which had been riding rather high until just a moment ago, suddenly takes a rapid nose dive.

He should be thrilled. If Jason finding something in common with Arsenal makes him happy, then the fact Jason is carrying on a conversation with someone as unusual as Starfire as though she's just another girl ought to make him _ecstatic_. Only he's _not_ talking to her like she's just another girl. Tim bites his lip. 

It isn't that he hasn't seen Jason flirt before - Jason always flirted with the girls in their building and on the street. He even flirted with _Rosa_ , sometimes, and that was why Tim had never thought anything of it. But the way Jason's sitting now...the way he's staring, obviously and unabashedly at the alien supermodel as she throws her head back and laughs unrestrainedly...

Starfire is a beautiful woman - very beautiful. It shouldn't be a surprise that Jason wants to sit that near to her, to lean in close... Her breasts are practically in his _face_ , and Jason looks perfectly happy with that state of affairs. He's really kind of _leering_ , in fact, and it doesn't exactly seem like Starfire _objects_. Rather the opposite, actually. She puts her hand on Jason's arm and bends closer to say something, and...

The realization hits him like a bucket of cold water. Tim takes an involuntary step back, stumbling on the raised tiling around the pool. Stone's still talking, but Tim doesn't even hear him - he doesn't see the sudden flash of concern on Garth's face. He mumbles something when Stone turns to him - some kind of excuse for why he's turning and hurrying for the veranda doors.

He can't be around people, right now. God knows what his face looks like. He can't stand there and watch Jason flirt with beautiful women, because the fact that hit him, with furious certainty, as he stood there staring...

Jason likes girls.

Jason _likes girls._

Tim feels vaguely ill. He starts down the hall for the stairs, but thinks better of it - he doesn't think he can be in their room right now, not with the ideas starting to click into place in his head. He ducks into the drawing room instead and shuts the door behind himself, leaning against it, the dark wood solid and reassuring.

Jason likes girls.

Tim's not an idiot. He knows that just because a person - a desperate person - is willing to do something for money doesn't mean it's something they _want_. If he'd ever thought that Jason was _enjoying_ himself on the nights he disappeared for hours and came home with money and food and a sick expression on his face - well, there's a reason Tim had been so focused on getting Jason _away_ from that life. He should have known better than to make assumptions about Jason's orientation based on events he'd been more-or-less forced into.

He'd kissed Tim first, Tim reminds himself - the night they'd robbed Joey Marino and made enough to cover food and a room at the Motel 7 for a _week._ He'd kissed Tim in his excitement and Tim had _gone for it_. And Jason had seemed to enjoy it. To enjoy kissing Tim. Kissing is one thing, though. The rest...

He'd talked about his other partners - not the men who paid him, but friends, other kids on the streets - talked about them like all he'd gotten out of the encounters was an orgasm and a moment of connection. Tim had never thought to ask if the friends in question had been male or female, and that seems like a huge oversight, now. That would be _very_ useful information, and might potentially quell the feeling swelling in Tim's breast.

It's really hitting him now that Jason's almost never been the one to make the first move. Every time they've touched each other, Tim's been the one to initiate - to _beg_ , usually. Beg until he overcomes Jason's reluctance, his apprehensions... Tim swallows hard and stumbles to the nearest chair, folding himself gracelessly into the seat. Jason barely even _touches_ Tim now - in the last two weeks, the little casual brushes and hair-touches that Tim didn't even pay attention to anymore have just...dried up. During the day, Jason acts like there's nothing between them at all. When they get back to their room, it's always Tim who kisses him first - always Tim who pulls him to the bed.  

He suddenly remembers something Jason said, once. It had sounded like a joke, but Jason's voice had been a little off...enough to make Tim protest, at the time. Jason had said that with the amount of money Tim was bringing in... He'd used the word _bitch_ , and Tim had _hated_ it - hated the implication, the suggestion of obligation. He's never wanted Jason to feel like he owes him _anything_ , and especially not that.

But...two nights ago, he'd held Jason down. He'd pinned Jason's wrists to the bed, because Tim had wanted to suck him off and Jason had protested. Jason had _kept_ protesting, and then he wouldn't even look at Tim, afterward.  He hasn't touched Tim since - not even the casual, friendly touches that Tim never thought he'd be so dependent on.

Tim brings his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around them. He doesn't want to believe it, but it explains so much - why Jason seems so reluctant, why he's relatively comfortable with mutual masturbation but balks when Tim tries to take things further, why he's barely made _eye contact_ with Tim for _two days_. If Jason's straight...

If Jason's _straight_...

The door opens a crack, and Tim jumps in surprise. For a moment, he thinks maybe Jason has come looking for him, but the glow from the hall silhouettes two figures in the doorway. Before Tim can decide what to do, the lights blaze to life and he finds himself staring at Arsenal and Troia, who both look very surprised to see him. Tim's eyes dart to their joined hands, then away.

"Hey, kid," Arsenal says. He probably thinks he's done a good job of hiding the annoyance in his voice. "What are you doing sitting in here in the dark?"

Tim slides out of the chair and makes his way to the door, slipping past them into the hall without saying a word.

If he opens his mouth, he doesn't know what will come out.

*

The halls and foyer are bright, but the parts of the house they actually live in are mostly pretty dark. Jason can hear the noise of the party - music, laughter, splashing from the pool - but it's distant and faint. He doesn't find Tim in the first few places he looks, so he heads up to their room, thinking that Tim's got a headache or something, or maybe Jason wasn't the only one sneaking a beer or two. The bedroom's dark, too, though.

Well, Tim will come back here eventually. Jason's shoes are pinching his toes - and Dick had totally lied, because Alfred had made him wear dress shoes to the party despite his protests and half-hearted threats of harm to various antiques.  He flips the lamp on and sits down to tug them off. It's kind of late, and Jason's not exactly tired, but it's been a long day, and, heh, he spent it on his best behavior. He'd met a few dozen _superheroes_ , tonight, and that had been kind of cool. And the girls had been hot. 

He pops a few buttons and flops backward across the end of the bed, stretching and thinking about Donna's marble-pale skin, Kory's hard muscle hidden by generous curves.  When Tim _does_ come back, Jason kind of hopes he'll be in the mood to start something.

He doesn't really get to...touch Tim anymore.  At first, around Bruce and Alfred, he hadn't cared quite so much.  But ever since Dick said that thing...about him _molesting_ Tim...Jason hasn't wanted to even _hug_ Tim when Dick and the others are still around, passing fucking _judgement_ , like they even know.

He growls and shakes his head hard.  It doesn't matter.  This room is _their_ place, where Jason can touch Tim if he damn well wants to, with no one around to watch or laugh or look _disapprovingly_ at them. 

But...only _safe_ touches.  Not anything that could...It has to be _Tim's_ choice, he reminds himself.  _Always_.  He's gotta let Tim take the lead.  Even _then_ he needs to be careful.  Because Tim might start something just because he thinks he _has_ to.

Like the other day, when he thought Jason had run out on him - and then that night... Jason closes his eyes and shakes his head again, guilt welling in his throat, choking him.  He doesn't want to think about that, think about how amazing it felt, how sweet Tim's mouth had been on him...he rolls over with a little groan, burying his face in the comforter, then freezes.

What the hell happened to their _blanket_?

They've never talked about it, just kept it folded at the end of their bed.  A little piece of _before_.  _Their_ blanket, the same one Tulio had used to play ghost, the same one Rosa had carefully patched for them at Christmas. 

Jason looks to see if it slipped down to the floor when he flopped down on the bed, then turns on the light and hunts around in the covers, but it's really not there.  Fuck...Alfred didn't... didn't get _rid_ of it or something, did he? If he was going to, he would have already, right? He definitely wouldn't have bothered _washing_ it, and all... Jason looks under the bed, just in case, then stops himself, feeling ridiculous.

The blanket is missing. Tim is missing. Probably, this isn't a coincidence. So where _is_ he? Jason stands up again and tries to think things through logically. Sometimes, when it gets chilly at night, Tim likes to sit in front of the fireplace with the blanket on his lap and read. It's not cold enough for a fire or anything, but, hey, Tim's not always super social, right? So maybe he just got tired of the party and came in to read somewhere, and took the blanket with him.

The theory makes enough sense that Jason kicks his shoes under the bed and heads down the hall for the library. There's no light visible underneath the door, and when he peeks inside, the room is dark. He's about to give up and go ask Alfred or something when his eyes are attracted by a slight movement, and he realizes Tim _is_ hanging out in here curled up in the blanket...in almost total darkness.

"Hey," Jason says, when Tim just stays there, stock still, like maybe he thinks Jason hasn't noticed him yet. "What are you doing in here?"

Tim's got his legs crossed on the sofa, most of his body hidden by the drape of the blanket. He shrugs under it and pulls it tighter around himself. "I thought I'd sleep in here, tonight."

"What?" says Jason, startled. " _Why_?"

Tim...isn't looking up. Something's wrong. "I thought you might like the room to yourself."  His voice, his whole affect, is completely flat, like the world's best poker face. Jason _hates_ when he gets like this.

Jason shakes his head. "Why would I want that?" he says.

Tim sighs and turns his face to the glass doors leading out to the balcony. They're open a crack, and Jason can hear a splash and a sudden shriek of feminine laughter. "You looked like you were having a good time. You didn't have to come in just because I did."

"Tim." Jason steps into the room, closing the door behind him, and stepping forward to switch on a lamp. Tim _flinches_ and seems to disappear even more under the blanket, like he'd just pull it over his head if he could. If Jason would let him. "What's wrong?" asks Jason, a little of his frustration creeping into his voice. "Talk to me, Tim."

"Nothing's wrong," he says, his voice just as flat as before.

"God _damn_ it, Tim." Jason squeezes his eyes shut and knocks his head back against the door, just once. Then he opens them and crosses the room to where Tim's sitting perfectly still and doing his best robot impression. "Tim," says Jason, hating the pleading note in his voice and entirely unable to help it, " _Please_. What did I do?"

Tim looks up at him suddenly, and maybe Jason would be happier to see the facade crack if Tim didn't look so miserable underneath. He's keeping his face still, but his eyes are wide and bright. "Nothing. _Nothing_. Jason, you haven't done anything wrong. I -" he breaks off and swallows, turning his face away again. "I just want to go to sleep, okay?" His voice is rough, now, and too quiet. "Go back to the party. You were having a good time with Troia and Starfire."

So _that's_ it. Jason should have known. It's a nasty fucking double-standard, too, because Dick was hanging all over Tim all night and Jason didn't say a _word_ , and now he's a bad guy because he couldn't ignore the enormous orange ta-tas being shoved in his face. He combs a hand back through his hair and sighs. "Look, I'm sorry. I was just flirting with them, okay? It didn't mean-"

Tim's shaking his head. "I'm not mad at you. Anyway, it's not like you made me any promises, right?"

Well, no...they've never really _talked_ about...whatever this is. But Jason's been sleeping with his arm wrapped around Tim every night for almost half a year, and he thinks that means _something_. "Obviously you _are_ mad at me, or you wouldn't be doing this," says Jason. This would be so much easier if Tim would just _shout_ at him. "I get it - you're pissed. You're jealous, right?"

Tim's laugh is hollow and bitter when it comes. "Jealous?" he says, finally raising his voice a little. "I don't have any _right_ to be _jealous_. You don't owe me anything, Jason. Anything. You can. You can do whatever you want, okay?"

"Unless what I _want_ is to get you to come to bed, apparently." A sudden thought strikes Jason, making him back off. "Is this because...is this about...?" He swallows, the other night vivid in his mind. He should have stopped him. He shouldn't have let Tim make himself do that. He _knew_ Tim would regret it later. And now, when Tim's just trying to get some _privacy_ , Jason's pushing him _again_...fuck. "Tim," he says, "If you don't want to share a bed, it's fine. You don't have to sleep in here. You take the bed. You know I'm used to bedding down anywhere, anyway."

Tim shakes his head furiously and pulls himself out of his slump, letting his feet fall to the floor so that he can sit up straight. "It's not - it _doesn't matter_ what I want, Jason. And you shouldn't say things like that! Just because you used to have it rough, that doesn't mean things have to go on the same way, okay? I'll be fine on the couch for a night, and in the morning I'll ask Alfred which room I should move my things to-"

" _Move your things to?_ " Jason bursts out before he can stop himself. It's like a sucker punch to the gut. "You're moving out on me?" If Tim really doesn't want him anymore...Jason shakes his head. "Don't bother," he says harshly. "You can have the room." He has to swallow again, hard, before he can finish. "Without you, I don't exactly have any reason to stick around."  

He turns toward the door, but before he can make it more than a step, Tim has him by the arm, trying to turn him around. Jason twists and tugs to free himself, but Tim counters with a quick grapple and goes for a leg-sweep that Jason barely manages to avoid. He tries to shove Tim back, but Tim uses the force of the move to spin him and tangle their legs together, taking them both to the ground with a thud.

Jason bangs his head on the hard-wood floor and winces - he was too focused on cushioning Tim's fall to protect his own vitals, and Tim's elbow hit him pretty hard in the stomach on the way down. He's not sure whether the blow was intentional. "Fuck!" he gasps when he can breathe again. "What was that for!"

Tim's sprawled across him, not even bothering to try and hold a pin. His forehead is pressed to Jason's chest, and he's not supporting his own weight at all - just lying on Jason with his hands tight to Jason's ribs. "I'm sorry," he says, his voice quiet and oddly strained. "Jason. _Jay_. Don't go. Please. I'm sorry. I'm _sorry_."

The fight goes out of Jason all at once, and he lets his head rest on the floor and his hands come up to rest on Tim's back. It's too much like the other day, when Tim had thought Jason was leaving for good, and it makes Jason's stomach twist. "Hey," he says, but Tim's not done.

Tim's breathing is labored enough that Jason can hear it even over the pounding of his own heart. "I didn't want it to go like this," he says, sounding close to tears.

Jason sighs and looks up at the ceiling. "Nobody ever does." His eyes feel hot, so he closes them. "What do you expect, though? That I'd be happy about it? I mean-" he has to stop for a second and breathe because he feels something wet run across his temple, into his hair. "I shouldn't have shouted at you. I know this is all my fault." He feels Tim's weight shift, and some of it lifts. Maybe Tim's going to get off of him and let him go now. Jason really kind of wishes he wouldn't. If this is the last chance he's going to get to feel Tim against him, he wants it to last. "I fucked up.  I fuck everything up."  He screws his eyes shut tighter against the burning sensation in them.   

"Jason, no," Tim says, his voice stronger now. "Please. None of this is your fault. I'm the one who-" he breaks off and his head drops again to rest on Jason's chest. "You don't have to sleep with me to stay here. Bruce wants you to work with him just as much as he wants me - maybe more. You're older, and you're stronger. Even if you don't want to be Bluejay, he's not going to throw you out, okay? He likes you. He already said he wants to _adopt_ you."

Jason opens his eyes and frowns. "I never thought...Tim, the only reason I'm _here_ is because I wanted to be with _you_." Tim mumbles something against his chest, and Jason pulls him up by the shoulders. "What?"

"But not to _be_ with me," Tim says, his voice rough.  "I'm...I'll be okay with that. You don't owe me anything, Jason, and I never wanted you to think you did."

Jason shakes him. "How can you say that?" He rolls until he pitches Tim off of him and sits up. "I wasn't _anything_ before I met you. I owe you _everything_!"

Tim scrambles to his knees beside him, and now they're face to face again. "That's not true!"

"It _is_. Jesus, Tim, I know you like to see the best in people, but I was just some thug! I was a _hustler_!" He's never actually said it out loud, before. He's not sure if he was expecting Tim to flinch...but he doesn't. He's still shaking his head like nothing Jason's saying is true. "Yes!" he shouts. "I jacked peoples' tires. I sucked dick for money. I did whatever I had to, to survive-"

"I know!" Tim shouts back, his voice rough with emotion. "I know, okay! But you don't _have to_ anymore!"

Jason's so startled by his outburst that he completely forgets what he was going to say. He just sits there, staring stupidly at Tim's shining eyes, his flushed face, listening to their panted breaths in the quiet room. The music outside had been turned off, at some point, and Jason can't hear party noises anymore. He doesn't care. "Tim," he says, quietly. "What are you talking about?"

Tim flinches back and spins on his ass before standing, walking over to shut the balcony doors. He stays there, leaning against the frame, not looking back at Jason at all, and Jason has to strain to understand him because he's speaking so quietly. "The sex," he says. "I've been an idiot. I didn't realize until tonight, when I saw you with Starfire. It had never even occurred to me that you might not be gay."

"I'm not," Jason says, feeling oddly defensive. "Are you?"

"Yes," Tim says, like it's nothing. "I thought you were, too. I guess...maybe I was blinded by wishful thinking, but that's not exactly an excuse. There is no excuse. All I can do is apologize."

"For _what?_ " Jason asks as he gets to his feet. Tim must hear him moving because he turns and leans back against the glass, finally looking Jason in the eye.

"I pushed you into things you weren't comfortable with, took advantage of..." he stops. "I thought maybe I was just bad at it. That maybe that was why you didn't ever seem to want to - why I always had to be the one to ask. I thought maybe I'd get better, and you'd like it more. You shouldn't have let me, Jason."

Jason stops a few feet from Tim. His eyes feel too wide for his face. "Are you fucking serious?"

Tim bites his lip and looks away.

"You are. You think you - what? You think I didn't _want to_? That I didn't like it when you sucked me off?"

"You've barely even looked at me for two days." Tim says softly. "You haven't touched me. Last night you rolled over in your sleep and put your arm across my chest, but the instant you woke up you were back on the edge of the bed-"

"You were laying there all stiff! I thought you were uncomfortable. Jesus, Tim..." He steps closer, until he can pull Tim into his arms despite a degree of half-hearted resistance. "I just don't want to push you. I don't know how this stuff works, okay? This... being together thing. I'd never slept with anybody more than once. Hell, I'd never even _slept_ with somebody, after."

Tim struggles against his hold. "Don't, Jason. You just _said_ you aren't gay-"

"That doesn't mean I don't love you!" That makes Tim go still and rigid in his arms, and Jason curses himself for letting that kind of confession slip out like that, but makes himself go on. "Or that I don't want you. People can go both ways, you know. And I pretty much want you all the time.  Jesus, Tim, do you know how much I've been holding _back_?"

Tim looks startled at that, and Jason thinks he might actually be getting through to him.  "But... _why_ -"

"Because I'm fucking _scared_ , okay?  I'm fucked up!  I was younger than _you_ when I started, and it fucked me up!  And I don't want to fuck you up, too!"  His arms tighten around Tim, pulling him hard against him.  "I'm supposed to _protect_ you, not...not..."  _Not *molest* you,_ he thinks.  

"Not _what_?" Tim says, sounding incredulous. He struggles a little in Jason's arms, and Jason instantly lets him go.  Tim pulls back and just looks at him, his eyes bright and searching. After a moment, his gaze softens and he puts his hands on either side of Jason's face.  "Jason...it's not the same." When Jason tries to shake his head, Tim uses his palms to hold him still. "It's _not_. You...meant it when you said you love me?"

"Of course I meant it!" Jason snaps, and tries to tug his head back, but Tim won't let go.

"Then that makes it different. Because I love you too. So much." His voice drops on the last few words, rough and quiet, and Jason can't even think of fighting anymore. He lets Tim tug his head down until their foreheads are pressed together.  Closes his eyes. "You don't have to protect me," Tim continues. "From the rest of the world, sure, but not from you, Jay. We're _partners_."   

"Partners," breathes Jason. 

Tim nods a little, his forehead sliding against Jason's. "I thought...I thought you didn't want me. That you were only sleeping with me because you felt obligated." Jason feels his mouth twist and he breathes out a laugh, but Tim isn't done talking. "The only way you can hurt me is by holding back. Or leaving, I guess, but -"

Jason wraps a hand around the back of Tim's neck and pulls him forward, bringing their lips together and kissing him like he's trying to swallow Tim whole.  He's not even really thinking, anymore - it's like Tim's words were a trigger, slamming open something inside of him, and maybe he'll regret this later, but right now, all he can do is kiss Tim and think, _I'll *show* you_.

Tim kisses back, gasping at first, and then making sounds... _eager_ sounds, his hands clutching Jason, pulling him closer. Jason puts everything he can into the kiss - everything hes been holding back. Every moment spent watching, wanting, every time he wanted to reach out and he didn't, every time he wanted Tim _moaning_ and turned away...

He slides his hands down Tim's sides, cups Tim's hips and tugs until Tim wraps his legs around Jason's _waist_ , and _fuck_ that's hot.  Jason shoves him up against the French doors, grinding against him as Tim makes a soft, high-pitched sound of need against his lips. 

"Jason... _Jason_..."

"I _always_ want you," growls Jason.  "Fuck, Tim!  I-"  He wraps his hands around Tim's ass, supporting and squeezing.  Tim's shuddering against him helplessly, his face flushed and his eyes closed.  His mouth is open, just a little, and Jason flashes back to the moment Tim first kissed him through his underwear two days ago.  "So fucking sexy," Jason pants.  "So fucking _sweet_." 

"N-not _sweet_ ," gasps Tim.  "Not-"

Jason slams him back against the doors as he thrusts.  "Sweet," he insists.  He kisses Tim's neck, then _bites_ it a little, sucks on it, and Tim melts against him with a moan.  "So fucking sweet," says Jason again.  "Want to _taste_ you."

That makes Tim's eyes fly open, hot and dazed.  "Anything," he whispers.  "Anything you _want_ , Jason. _Jason_."

"Fucking drive me _crazy_ ," says Jason, and he wants to let go of Tim's ass and jerk him off, wants to lay him down right there on the floor and _fuck_ him, wants, _wants_.  But he can't stop thrusting against Tim's body, feeling Tim quivering against him every time, with every word.  "Mine," Jason grits out. "He can't _have_ you.  _Want_ you.  N-need you-"  Tim arches against him, a short, sharp cry escaping his lips as his body shakes and spasms against Jason's.  Jason feels his lips stretch into an almost feral grin.  "Not done with you yet," he whispers into Tim's ear, nipping at the lobe. 

Tim just whimpers, his arms tightening around Jason's neck. He moans in distress when Jason tries to pull back, gripping tighter with his long, lithe legs, fingers scrabbling uselessly at the wooden transoms to hold himself up as Jason steps back and away.  Jason sinks to his knees, letting Tim slide down the doors until he comes to rest on Jason's lap.

Tim's legs relax their hold, and he pulls himself up to his knees with Jason's shirt as leverage. He uses his grip to pull Jason up and forward until Jason is kissing him again, loving the sounds he's making, the strength in his hands as he strokes Jason's chest. "Gonna swallow you whole," Jason promises between moans. "Take you so deep-"

"Jay!" Tim gasps, arching and thrusting against him. His head knocks against the doors, and they rattle on their hinges. Jason bites his throat, over his pulse, across the front, sucking and scraping with his teeth, leaving marks behind.

He fumbles with the buttons on Tim's shirt, sending two of them flying in his haste to get to skin. Tim's got _gorgeous_ skin - pale and smooth, soft over lean muscle and bone. Jason scrapes his teeth along the ridge of Tim's clavicle, follows the rough touch with the sweep of his tongue. 

Tim doesn't build muscle as fast as Jason does, but he's definitely filled out from the scrawny kid Jason met all those months ago in the arcade.  His pecs are defined, now - Jason smooths his hands over them, loving the way they fit against his palms.  Tim's nipples are small, hard nubs in the hollows of his hands.  Jason shifts to flick his thumbs over them, grinning when it makes Tim jerk and shiver against him.

"You like that?" Jason murmurs, and strokes over them with his palms. He hasn't let his hands wander too much before now, hasn't let himself learn Tim's body the way he's been aching to.

Tim makes a high, whining sound in the back of his throat and arches into the touch. "Yes. God. Everything you do - I like _everything_."

Jason wants to kick himself for holding back for so long.  He leans forward and tastes Tim, feels the point of Tim's nipple against his tongue.  Tim almost always smells clean, now, like soap and the fancy shampoo they use.  But underneath, there's a hint of _him_ , of the musky smell that Jason still catches a whiff of after a good spar with him sometimes. 

He laps at Tim's nipple again, making Tim twitch.  God, Tim's so responsive...so _hungry_ for this.  Desperate.  Why hadn't Jason seen it sooner?  All Jason's doing is playing with his nipples, he hasn't even touched him below the waist yet, and already Tim's hard again, thrusting against Jason's stomach, coming apart for him, begging him.

Even as he thinks it, Tim's writhing, keening under his hands.  "Jay, _please_ ," he wails.

Jason's never been able to deny Tim when he's like this...he's beginning to realize that it's taken everything he's had to hold back as long as he has.  Now that he _can_ touch...now that it's _okay_ , he can't stop.  He leans backward, pulling Tim on top of him, then rolls them over, pinning Tim's wrists to the wooden floor as he nuzzles Tim's chest.  He sucks hard against Tim's breastbone, trails his lips down in a straight line.  Tim's bellybutton is a tempting target - Jason breathes into it, making Tim's stomach muscles flutter, then noses at the thin line of hair trailing downward from there.  

"Oh god," Tim gasps, and his stomach spasms under Jason's touch. "Jay."  Jason lets go of his wrists and pulls back enough to fumble at Tim's belt, his eager fingers clumsy on the buckle. When he finally gets it, he opens Tim's pants and pulls the zipper so roughly that it jumps the track before grabbing Tim's waistband and tugging, yanking his pants and underwear down his thighs and over his knees, turning them inside out as he goes. Tim sits up on his elbows and tries to help, but Jason bats his hands away and pushes him back to the floor with one hand in the middle of his chest.  Tim's eyes go wide...but he stays where Jason puts him and doesn't object.

Tim's shoes present an obstacle to his progress, and Jason growls in frustration before ripping them off, one at a time, and throwing them aside so that finally - _finally_ \- he gets the stupid pants and underwear and everything _off_.  Tim looks up at him with heavy-lidded eyes as Jason pauses a moment, just staring down at Tim, really taking him in.

Tim's not a prettyboy like Grayson, not big and built like Roy or Jason himself.  Tim is...compact.  Wiry.  Jason flashes back to the moment they met, Tim's arm swinging down, connecting with that slimeball's head.  Small, but _dangerous_. Brave. Tough.  Smart.

"Jay..." pleads Tim, and Jason grins down at him.  He kneels at Tim's feet, pushing apart Tim's legs.  It's really late, now. There's no sound from outside, and Jason can hear nothing but their harsh pants, loud in the quiet room.  Leaning forward, Jason kisses the tip of Tim's penis. He looks up to meet Tim's eyes and _licks_ , swiping at the mess Tim has made of himself. Tim stuffs a hand into his mouth.

In one smooth motion, Jason swallows him down.

Tim was right.  It _is_ different.  Because it's _Tim_.  It's Tim, and Jason's making him _yell_ , even if Tim's trying to muffle the sounds with his hand.  Jason lets his eyes fall half-closed, lets his tongue move and his throat work.  Tim beats the floor with his free hand, his head whipping from side to side, incoherent sounds pouring out of him around his fingers. 

Jason's making him _lose it_. 

And suddenly, Jason realizes...he _loves_ it.  He loves making Tim lose it.  Something falls into place in his mind with an almost audible 'click'.  Tim hadn't been lying - he'd enjoyed sucking Jason off.  He'd loved _every minute of it_.  A wave of relief crashes through Jason, so intense that it leaves him feeling weak. 

He comes up for air, gasping, then goes down again, and Tim just keeps making these _sounds_ , driving Jason _crazy_.  He knows it's not gonna be much longer, even though Tim's already come once.  Tim's cries get louder, higher, until he's _screaming_.  His free hand sinks into Jason's hair, gripping, hanging on, and Jason knows he can't help himself.  Tim...controlled, reserved, _stoic_ Tim who doesn't even let people _touch_ him.  And he's letting Jason do this to him.  _Wants_ this from Jason, more than anything.

Tim tugs urgently at his hair, and Jason would laugh if his mouth wasn't full of Tim's cock.  No way he's backing off now.  He pushes down as far as he can go.  Tim goes _rigid_ beneath him, the sounds he's making echoing against the walls, and comes down Jason's throat. Jason swallows around him as he spasms, and then pulls back just enough to catch the last taste in his mouth, holding it, laving the head with his tongue until Tim is whimpering and pushing at his face, too sensitive for any more.  

He sits back slowly onto his heels, letting Tim's cock slide from between his lips with a wet pop. Tim is staring at him with his eyes wide and glassy, his face flushed, his hair in total disarray, moonlight shining on his pale skin. He's _beautiful_ , and he's _Jason's_ \- he _loves_ Jason. There's a sudden warmth in Jason's chest that he hasn't felt since his mother died.  

Tim lets out a long breath and lets his head fall with a thud that sounds kind of painful. Jason huffs a short laugh and leans over him, planting his hands on either side of Tim's face and bending down to kiss him lightly on the lips. Tim's eyes fly open again, and he smiles up at Jason, reaching up to pull him down for another kiss, licking Jason's lips, his tongue, humming into Jason's mouth with obvious contentment. His hands slide down Jason's neck, over his back, rucking his shirt out of his pants and slipping under to get to his skin. Jason drops to an elbow and reaches between them to get his own pants open. He's having some trouble doing it one handed, though, and once Tim realizes what he's doing, he pushes Jason's hands away to do it himself.

"That was really, really amazing, Jason," Tim says, his voice rough from shouting. "And I sound like an idiot-"

"No," Jason protests, and kisses him again, then moans as Tim reaches into his open fly to squeeze him through his briefs. "Jesus, I love your hands."

"Your _mouth_ ," Tim murmurs, with something that sounds remarkably like religious awe. It makes Jason chuckle and lick _Tim's_ mouth. He gets his tongue captured and bitten for his trouble, and then Tim's pushing his pants down with one hand and drawing Jason out with the other, jacking him with slow strokes that make Jason moan and shiver. "I really like your penis, too. For the record." 

That makes Jason laugh again, but it turns into another moan as Tim squeezes him. 

"I do!" Tim says defensively.  His grip tightens a little.  "You're not ever allowed to hold back again," says Tim more quietly, his rhythm excruciatingly slow but steady.  " _Ever_.  Promise me."

"I-" Jason cuts himself off with a gasp. 

Tim _stops_.

"I promise!" pants Jason. He tries to thrust into Tim's grip, but Tim moves with him, not letting him get any friction. "Fuck, Tim, don't _stop!_ "

Tim's smile is slow and wicked, but he tightens his grip and strokes again, still slow, but _tight_ , now, and Jason groans. "Jason?" Tim says, voice light, almost sweet.

Jason sucks air in through his teeth and lets his head fall forward, turning it to the side so that he's breathing on Tim's shoulder instead of in his face. "Y-yeah?"

Tim turns his head until his lips are in Jason's hair, his breath tickling Jason's forehead. "I want you to fuck my hand."

Jason makes a small, embarrassing noise and stops trying _not_ to thrust, letting his hips move like he wants - almost like he wants.

"Like you'd fuck _me_ , Jason," Tim urges, his voice low and intense, almost hypnotic.  Jason loses it, pumping mindlessly into Tim's slick fist. It's too easy to imagine, with Tim's knees up around Jason's hips, his bare leg stroking Jason's calf through his pants. He gasps and curses and bites Tim's shoulder, because the alternative is shouting the house down. "Would you - oh, not now, I want to make you _come_ , now. But... would you? I want- I think I want..."

"God!" Jason gasps, thrusting down hard enough to press Tim's fist to his own stomach, letting out a rough shout as pleasure surges through him. His orgasm seems to last an eternity, fading into white sparks at the edge of his vision, and then he's slumping forward, unable to hold up his own weight, falling forward onto Tim's chest and driving the air out of both of their lungs.

He closes his eyes and tries to catch his breath, panting against Tim's throat and feeling Tim's heart beat under him, his slim chest rise and fall. Tim's hand comes to rest on the small of his back, tracing sticky circles above his waistband. He cups Jason's head with his other hand and strokes into his hair, dragging his blunt nails lightly over Jason's scalp. It feels good, and Jason hums happily. He's pretty sure he could spend the rest of his life, right here.

"That was..." Tim starts, and trails off. He strokes the back of Jason's neck. " _God_. Jay. I should really, really be mad at you right now."

The prior lassitude in his limbs makes it feel strange, but Jason tenses all the same, feeling his heart creep into his throat. Had he been wrong, somehow? Tim had _said-_

"Stop." Tim says flatly. "I didn't mean it like that." He sighs. " _I should be mad_ because we could have been having sex like that _this whole time._ "

Jason relaxes again, and the relief in his chest bubbles out as a quiet laugh. "That much better?"

"By _orders of magnitude_. Jason, I can't _move_."

Jason laughs again, but he agrees on all points. Sex is, apparently, infinitely better when you're not hating yourself through most of it. Jason doesn't feel inclined to move much, either. His bones feel like jelly and his feet and fingers are still tingling. He nuzzles against Tim's neck and breathes deliberately over one of the marks he'd left, just to feel Tim squirm under him. "You _were_ going to sleep in here, anyway."

"Not on the _floor._ "

Jason rolls to the side and reaches out, fumbling at end of the couch until he finds the edge of their blanket. He rolls back, stretching out beside Tim instead of on top of him, and drags the blanket up over them. "We've slept in worse places."

Tim stares at him like he's insane for a moment, then his lips quirk into a smile. "True," he concedes. Then, "You do realize Alfred is probably going to find us in the morning?"

Jason doesn't even care enough to pull his pants up.


End file.
